DEEP THOUGHTS (AND SHALLOW ONES) FROM A WRITER-PRODUCER-POET-COLUMNIST WHO'S STILL TRYING TO FIGURE THINGS OUT
LB: “Honey, I’m looking at a cartoon here and not sure I get it.”
G the B: “Honey, what’s it about? What don’t you get?”
LB: “Well, do you think aging men worry about crepey skin? Or is it just women?”
G the B: “Well, I’d have to say that I’ve never worried about it myself. I’m too busy avoiding creepy men.”
And here’s the rimshot, from a comic called Reply All that I ran across at arcamax.com:
Oh, and here’s me, looking up at the woman I love:
LYMI,
LB
Strange how the same guy who had no
Problem showing me how he couldn’t
Possibly party without cocaine looked
Shocked when I said I can’t get out of bed
In the morning without coffee.
Overheard in the parking lot of that biker bar and grill I’m obviously spending too much time around:
Biker #1: “I know why I’m here, but I don’t know why you are.”
Biker #2: “I know why you’re here, but I don’t know why I am.”
Biker #3: “I don’t give a fuck about what either of you knows. I’m going home.”
The three of them pulled out their key fobs and growled away on their Harleys. A waitress taking a smoking break looked over her shoulder at me.
Waitress: “Soft tails that don’t need kick starting, with orthodontists riding ’em. Of course this country’s gone to hell!”
I nodded like I knew what she was talking about. I was glad the bikers hadn’t seen me smiling, because only God knows what could’ve happened if they’d gotten a look at my teeth.
What?!
Again?!
How can this be?
Some (many?) of those who come to this blog may not believe me, but I don’t really think everything in the world is about me.
I do, however, keep finding bits of evidence that at least some fairly common things on this planet – like newspaper cartoons – continue to invade my awareness and sum me up better than I ever will be able to.
It happens more and more as I get older. Maybe because the demographic for newspaper readers is becoming not larger – oh no, the stats assure us that’s out of the question – but smaller and older because why would anyone young ever allow themselves to be caught paying attention to anything but the latest media?
Anyway, for better and worse, here I sort of am:
Arlo and Janis by Jimmy Johnson
And here as well, although this at least is a situation affecting (as the host of one of my childhood favorite TV shows, Super Circus, was wont to say), “boys and girls of all ages:”
Reality Check by by Dave Whamond
Oh dear, sorry. I forgot to tell you not to look at the one immediately above. If the world really is all about me, we’ll soon be reading about the alarming drop in sales of everything bagels, don’t you suppose?
LYMI,
LB